// Leaf Group Lifestyle, How to Find a Boyfriend for Teenage Girls, How to Know If Your Guy Friend Would Date You. This is how you know if a man really loves you or just wants to have sex with you. He moves quickly, trying to convince you to fall for him right away. And feminism be damned — he treats you like the princess that you are. Men often get the reputation of being players, but women can be just as deceptive with the people they date. If you look inviting, he will start initiating friendly conversation and before long he will have your contact number and may be even a “date”. How Do I Get His Attention Being A Shy Girl? All My Friends Are in a Relationship And I am Single – What To Do? The rule of thumb I've learned to abide by isn't new: If he's acting like he has something to hide, then chances are he has something to hide. Can they change, you ask? Basically the players are looking for girls who are “easy”, these are the ones who are impulsive and short-sighted when blinded by attraction. He is Too Smooth. Players are bold in their approach, and don’t come across as being shy about making eye contact, smiling or starting a conversation, and flirting. What Does It Mean When A Guy Says He Needs Time? However, if he's regularly acting sus when it comes to his cell phone, then there may be something he's not telling you. Of course, most of it is completely artificial and a “put on” purely for the purpose of catching a girl’s attention and spiking her attraction. How To Tell If A Man Is A Player? To get some input, Elite Daily sat down with dating expert and relationship writer Demetrius Figueroa. These guys, in general, are quite cynical about the very concept of “love” and their only interest is in surface level pleasure. You can't expect an immediate invite, but if you've been dating a while and still haven't met a single friend or seen even the outside of her apartment, you may not be the only one. Again, this doesn't mean if he excuses himself once to have a conversation with his ailing grandmother that you should assume he's arranging a booty call. Look for telltale signs in the dating profile, and pay attention if you meet in person. According to Figueroa, what separates a true player from a single guy exploring his options is one thing — manipulation. He may be hiding his interactions with other women. If you can step back a little, you may be able to spot some signs that you're dating a player, including: It can be a little more difficult to spot a player online or on a dating app. This means it's important to learn to read between the lines. A players knows that the easiest way to get a girl “swooning” over him is to give her the “initial” importance. They exhibit “artificial” behavior intended at increasing a girl’s attraction for them; and once she is hooked in her attraction they go for the kill. So he will try to up your attraction as quickly as he can. He's constantly texting or doesn't want you to see his phone. If they sense that a girl is too reserved or cautious, they usually move on to more interesting prospects. When a guy is a player, his intention is to “capture” as many girls as he can. Once you've confirmed that the guy you're dating is exhibiting player-esque behavior, is there anything you can really do about it? According to Figueroa, any form of intentional dishonesty, no matter how small, is a major red flag. Men often get the reputation of being players, but women can be just as deceptive with the people they date. You can almost sense a sexual tension in their voice and body language, when they are with you on a date. (6 Signs to Look For). Girls usually have a “gut” instinct about players, but some guys are so good at hiding their “player” nature that they can get past the defenses of the most intuitive girl. He may try to convince you that your life would be horrible without him. –, 8 Things I Find Attractive in a Woman (That Have Nothing to Do With Looks), What Do I Write in My Boyfriend’s Birthday Card? How would that man behave towards you; what might that man tell you versus a man who is really interested in a real relationship? There's nothing quite as sobering as finding out someone you trust isn't being honest — so sobering, in fact, that many of us try our hardest to find a way to justify dishonest behavior in the hopes of protecting the flawless image of someone we've built up in our heads. Their only motive is to seek sexual pleasure from a girl and ditch her when they no longer find her stimulating enough. Here are some signs that indicate that a man is a player: When a guy is a player, he is adept at striking conversations with girls, and is usually suave in his flirting. Perfect might be hiding something... or worse, someone. Guys who are seasoned “players” can be very shrewd and subtle in their tactics. The same behaviors that apply in real life may pop up in online dating, but you may see other signs as well. I hate to break it to you, but both genders notice people they find attractive — sneaking a quick look is totally normal. By the second date, they usually try to initiate some form of physical intimacy. He is such a player ! They can “impress” a girl quite easily with their mannerisms, body language and talk. (4 Things You Must Include!). They practice their opening lines, their conversation starters and some “flirty” jokes and punch lines, with professional alacrity. People often behave this way because of poor self-esteem. "The Modern Man is teaching aspiring Romeos the natural way [to get a girlfriend]" A Current Affair, TV show. There is a difference. So when a girl is deeply attracted to a guy, she usually ignores her intuition. So as a girl, how do you know when a man is only interested in having sex with you, or when a man is plainly being a player? Players often use mind games to convince their dates that they are interested when they are actually emotionally unavailable. That being said, if the person you're seeing is constantly gawking at other women in your presence, then this is disrespectful. It's easy to get caught up in that fantasy world. You feel as though the situation is too good to be true. 7 Steps to Make a Man Fall in Love With You. You notice huge inconsistencies between the dating profile and the real-life persona. Feeling in control and having lots of people fall for them boosts their ego. Knowing what a player is and learning how to spot the signs can help you avoid the heartbreak that comes along with dating one. In contrast, most “normal” guys are quite shy about making eye contact with a girl, and would usually look away when the girl meets their eye. If, however, you are comfortable with a non-monogamous relationship or a short-term arrangement, then Figueroa suggests having a conversation to let them know you "don't particularly care if he's seeing other people or not," but that you would like to request "that he's honest with you.". If she's always unavailable on weekends, for example, she may be a player. Your date is very vague in profiles and in conversations. Since guys like this are so withholding, it's all too easy to get caught up in the chase, think you're in love, and wind up curled in the fetal position sobbing like a junkie awaiting their next fix. "If he's [not being specific] about where he's been, who he was with, why he was busy, or anything else like that, that should be a clear sign to you that he's a player," says Figueroa. Often pronounced " playa ". For many players, getting someone to fall for them is a bit like an addiction. It’s actually easy to weed out a player. But it's rare that these types of dating narratives have a happy ending. There's some variation in the definition of a player in dating, but the general consensus is that it's a person who doesn't want to commit but makes his partner believe he does. Some people are private, but you should both start sharing things if you're truly interested in one another. They are usually charming and may sweep you off your feet with their romantic talk and gestures. In my opinion, it's always imperative to trust your gut, even if you don't have proof he's up to no good. Players often have plenty of practice and know just what you want to hear. An honest guy with nothing to hide won't be put off or dodgy about follow-up questions as long as they are casual and non-accusatory. So he will instigate feelings of “sexual” attraction by his mannerisms and then quickly get her to act out the impulse. It should be noted that being guarded isn't the same as being dishonest. He's the full package; he's well-spoken, good-looking, and confident. If the guy you're dating avoids being specific about details like what he does in his free time (i.e. Boasting or unsubstantiated claims may be an indicator of player tendencies. So you're dating a new guy and totally smitten.